Why Psychodynamic Psychotherapy?
Because You Need to Better Understand Who You Are Before You Can Create the Change You Seek
You’ve already tried just about everything you can think of to resolve the issues you’re experiencing …
You’ve read the books, listened to the podcasts, taken long walks, meditated, exercised, and talked things through with family members and friends – yet nothing seems to help, at least not for long.
Sound familiar?
If so, you’re far from alone.
If you’re like a lot of the clients I work with, you might even be able to explain exactly what’s wrong – what you’re anxious about, what keeps happening in your relationships, why you keep getting stuck in the same conflicts, or why self-doubt shows up the moment you try to make a change.
And still, you find yourself in the same place:
- Having the same arguments time and time again
- Overthinking decisions until they’ve been made for you
- Doing everything you can to appear “fine” on the outside, while it feels like everything is falling apart on the inside
- Knowing what you want … but struggling to follow through and make it happen
- Feeling disconnected from everyone – especially yourself
I get it.
I understand how frustrating it can be to spend hours, days, weeks circling around the same issues – playing things over and over again in your head, planning out what you need to do differently, only to have the same issues keep coming back anyway.
That’s because we can understand what needs to change – even what needs to be done – but without understanding ourselves it’s often next to impossible to create the change we seek.
Achieving that self-awareness – doing the work necessary to go deeper and really dive into the thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and behaviors that are keeping you stuck, so you can create positive, lasting change in your relationships and life – is what psychodynamic psychotherapy is all about.
What Is Psychodynamic Psychotherapy?
There are a lot of types of therapy that can help you learn specific coping skills and tools – and they can definitely be helpful.
But coping isn’t the same thing as transformation.
Psychodynamic psychotherapy is a depth-oriented approach to therapy that helps you explore the emotional and relational forces shaping your life – especially the ones that operate outside of your conscious awareness.
We’ll definitely make sure you have the skills and tools you need to navigate any symptoms you’re experiencing.
But more than this, psychodynamic therapy is about helping you understand why you feel what you feel and do what you do – so you can create conscious, lasting change.
In plain terms, psychodynamic therapy asks:
- What is the anxiety, sadness, or anger you’re experiencing trying to protect you from?
- What part of you keeps getting triggered in relationships – and why?
- What did you learn (often early on) about needing, depending, asking, expressing, or trusting that’s playing out in your relationships today?
- What patterns once helped you to cope – but are now keeping you stuck?
Many of the ways we struggle as adults aren’t as random as they may seem.
Maybe it’s the kind of partner you choose. The way you shut down during conflict. The way you take care of everyone else while feeling alone. The way you procrastinate until panic kicks in. The way you get close … and then pull away.
All of these patterns can be shaped by relationship histories, attachment experiences, and coping strategies that made sense at the time but are no longer serving your best interests.
None of this means there’s anything “wrong” with you.
You simply learned to adapt to relationships and life as best you could at the time. But the survival strategies that have kept you safe are now holding you back.
Psychodynamic psychotherapy can help you understand these strategies with compassion – then start to let go of what no longer serves you so you can create real transformation.
In our work together, we’ll pay particular attention to:
- Recurring patterns in relationships, work, self-worth, and emotional reactions (those things that seem to just keep happening)
- Emotions you’ve learned to minimize or override (often without realizing it)
- Your relationships (past and present) – and what they’ve taught you about closeness, conflict, and safety
- Ways you protect yourself, including people-pleasing, perfectionism, overfunctioning, shutting down, staying hyper-vigilant, or doing everything you can to appear “fine”
- What happens between us in therapy, because the therapy relationship acts as a mirror that reflects the same dynamics that show up in your life – giving us the chance to explore and understand these things with greater self-compassion and safety
As you begin to recognize the patterns playing out in your life and better understand why they’re there, you create more space for choice.
That’s when change starts to feel less like forcing yourself and more like freedom – the freedom to choose your own path forward toward authentic relationships and a meaningful life you truly love.
Ready to get started?
Am I the Best Psychodynamic Psychotherapist for You?
Outside of your curiosity and willingness to do the work, nothing is more important to the therapeutic process than the healing relationship you create with your therapist.
All of our emotional wounds occur in relationships – either in our relationships with others or with ourselves.
This is why healing and growth also need to take place in the context of our relationships. And creating this healing relationship is what counseling and psychotherapy are all about.
It’s also why – as a licensed marriage and family therapist and behavioral and mental health therapist who’s been helping individual adults and couples in Berkeley, California, for the better part of the past two decades – I practice from a psychodynamic, relational, and attachment-focused perspective.
But we’re all unique individuals. We connect with people differently and choose different paths toward healing and growth.
This is why – just as there’s no one “right” or “best” therapeutic model or technique that works equally well for all clients – no single clinician can be the best psychodynamic therapist for every client.
So how do you know whether I’m the right therapist for you?
The only way to really find out is to contact me today, schedule a free initial consultation, ask any questions you have, and see if we feel like a good fit for working together. And I encourage you to interview a few other therapists, as well, to make sure you’re making the best choice for you.
What I can say is that I’m not one of those therapists who’s going to just sit and listen to the problems and symptoms you’re struggling with.
Don’t get me wrong, I will listen intently and intentionally to everything you have to say. But we’ll also explore why these things are occurring – the thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and relational patterns that have shaped how you see yourself and interact with other people and the world in general.
I’m here to help you:
- Understand how past experiences and relationships may be shaping how you relate to others (and to yourself) in the present
- Acknowledge and change any coping strategies that are getting in the way of new possibilities
- Develop a stronger, more compassionate connection to yourself, so you can transform the way you move through the world
My style is warm, collaborative, and engaged. I’ll listen closely, ask thoughtful questions, reflect patterns that you may not have noticed, and help you connect the dots between what you’re feeling now and what has shaped you over time.
And when it’s helpful, we can also look at practical strategies like boundaries, communication skills, and navigating conflict – always in a way that fits you, and in service of deeper understanding and lasting change.
If you’re curious about what’s beneath the surface, and you’re ready to do the work necessary to better understand yourself and finally start creating the change you seek, I invite you to reach out today, schedule a free initial consultation, and see if we’re a good fit for working together. I look forward to meeting you. But the person you’re really about to meet is YOU.